11 months ago, right before the birth of my second son, a friend of mine said “when it comes to having kids, a second child isn’t just equal to two, it is three!”
I wasn’t quite sure I believed him and basically just laughed it off. Perhaps it was a personal organization issue, I thought (yeah, not very nice).
Now I understand the math …
With two kids (in our case, a toddler and an infant), it takes at least one parent out of the loop at any given time. It is a rare moment when one kid or the other doesn’t need attention — potty, diaper, food, pick-up, nursing, saving from some imminent disaster, or just there to play with them. This leaves only one parent to go grocery shopping, cook, clean, do laundry, pay bills, deal with all the myriad obligations that come with being a family.
So, one plus one equals two kids (PLUS one parent by default) which equals three.
I need some “me” time, Billy!
KV is four+ months old and is as mellow and sweet and intense as they come. He is a happy kid, who breaks into broad smiles at the sight of his mama, big brother and me; hangs out happily watching big brother dart around all over the place; and knows how to reach out with all his strength for what he wants, grunting, groaning and screaming as needed.
Before KV, I could not imagine loving more than one child. How could one have the capacity to feel so deeply for more than one human? And yet, here I sit, still looking at the San Francisco skyline and the Bay Bridge (did I mention that we moved?), with multiple love disorder over my two boys. Overwhelmed.
I am sometimes saddened by the time in between my posts. Approx 4+ months have passed and as I sit contemplating the San Francisco skyline and the Bay Bridge from our house (oh, yeah, we moved to San Francisco from Los Angeles almost a month ago — did I not mention that?), I try to hold on to all that I have experienced with my two boys. Time flies, yes, but harder still are the memories that fade no matter how deeply you color them.
Two days ago, KJ, came up behind me, put his arms around my legs, and looked up at me with a huge smile, when I looked down at him, he, unprompted, said “I love you, papa.”
KV, our second son was born last month. He is healthy, happy (from what we can tell of a four-week old) and blessed with a voracious appetite. Mom is doing well and the birth was amazing.
Special shout-out to the Good Samaritan Hospital in Los Angeles — the staff and services were great.
KJ (the older guy (we may need a new naming convention)) is taking to his younger brother really well. He tries to soothe him when crying and recently said “KV is my friend best friend!” Something perhaps every parent of more than one kid hopes for.
Having two children (boys if that matters), is pushing my fatherhood chops to the next level (if it was a game, I would be leveling up, I guess). While challenging, both LD and I are amazed that we are actually doing it. We look at our two boys asleep, one sprawled, one swaddled, on our bed in disbelief and awe.
We are lucky and humbled by the joy and craziness of our two sons. More on how it going, soon …